what do you want to be remembered for?

What do I want to be remembered for? I’ve never thought about it really. Do I even want to be remembered at all? I think I do. I hear people say that what they seek in life is happiness. But what really is that? For some it is money, or fame.
I really don’t know what happiness is for me, yet. I’ve never really been truly happy. Yes, maybe I’ve felt that for a few hours, or minutes. But to be truly, undoubtedly, whole-heartily happy with my life is something that I’ve never felt. Quite honestly, sometimes it seems like such an out of this world thing to think that I ever could be happy, truly I mean. But then I also think that every person experiences this happiness at least once in their lives. I choose to believe that, because life is too hard otherwise.

I think that I just haven’t reached that point in my life yet. But to imagine the things that I’m going to have to go through in order to reach that point is like dipping my fingers into oblivion, and that is a pool full of infinite possibilities, which I am not yet willing to evaluate.

Sure, it’s a daunting thought thinking about all of the things life will throw at you. It’s impossible for it not to be daunting. But there is beauty within the unknown. To only think about all the terrible things that are in front of you is very one-sided. I believe that there is a reason for everything you experience– mostly lessons. And without the bad things, well, how would we be able to tell that we were experiencing good things.

It’s super scary, but I’ve learned that you should do you best to also embrace the bad things– that just means you are one step closer to the good.
Now back to being remembered– that’s also an insanely intimidating thought. It really puts your entire life into perspective. I think it makes you put all of your experiences under a microscope. I believe that we need to take experiences for what they are; experiences. Overthinking them can make us crazy, and truthfully, you are too busy living these experiences to have time to analyze them. So when it comes to being remembered, it isn’t even worth it. I’d rather be remembered as someone who lived their life for their own person, regardless of what anyone else thought, than someone who was constantly overthinking and second guessing themselves based on the opinions of others.

The point that I’m trying to make is simple– go with your gut and follow your heart. There is a whole world out there. Do you best not to limit yourself to a 50-mile radius. But if that 50-mile radius makes you happy, then by all means, stay.
I find it helpful to very rarely put your life in perspective. Occasionally sit down and look at your life as it is. The people around you, your job, and where you live. When you are old and at the end of your life will you look back at the moment you are experiencing right now and be proud of it? Would you have rather been doing something else? Is there a dream that you want to pursue but are too afraid, mostly of failure?

Think about this moment, right now. Are you happy? Is this moment something you will look back on and say, “yes, in that moment I was happy. I was doing what I needed to in order to be happy.” If not, get the hell out while you still can.

Please, I am begging you. If you have a dream, go chase it. If you are unhappy in a relationship, get out. If your job is putting you to sleep, leave. Life is too short to spend your time wastefully.
The journey to get where you want to be is the scariest thing you will ever go through. But the journey is what makes up your life. We get the day we were born and the day we die. What will you make of the dash in between. I hope it’s worth it.

-Kelsi

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