silver lining

My writing hasn’t felt right lately. I feel like I’m trying too hard to find something that isn’t there. I’m pulling things from my mind and writing a mediocre draft on them. It bothers me to know that my posts lately could be so much better. The subjects I’m talking about are good, and my points are sort of making sense. Except I know the 300-600 word posts I’m making should be 600-1,000 at least. I have so much more to say, I’m just not doing it. I’ve started to lose the concept of making it good, and instead just making sure I’m posting everyday.

While I’m working on fixing this problem, I’m going to continue to post. I’ve accepted that they haven’t been my best lately and understand that I now have the opportunity to revisit subjects because of that; there’s my silver lining. The reality of this situation is actually very positive. I’m only improving myself and my writing throughout this struggle. So, I’m going to continue to show up and post knowing it can ALWAYS be better. There is always room for improvement of some kind; right now, however, I realize there is room for a lot of improvement. And it’s my fault I’ve slacked.

I’ve been thinking about my lack of true effort on these posts for about two weeks. I wasn’t ready to confront it until now. That’s okay, though, because now I am confronting it. If you’re struggling with accepting something—anything—that’s okay. Understand that at some point if you want to improve and move past it, you have to hit it head on and deal with it. Work to change it, work to accept it, work to heal it. Hiding isn’t an option because you will always be found.

-Kelsi

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