get lost on purpose

This statement can easily be questioned. Most people try to avoid being lost at all costs. When you look at life on a scale—one end being lost the other being comfortable—the majority of people tend to lean towards one specific side. That side is: comfortable; which makes the most sense. Why willingly run towards the unknown? But I have something to counter that question… you are constantly living inside the unknown, you either embrace it or you trick yourself into believing you’re actually in ultimate control.

If you’re someone who hides from this fact, life has a really good way of throwing it in your face when you least expect it. And when this happens, it completely throws you for a loop because you have been living with a huge blindspot – on purpose.

I used to cry myself to sleep thinking about the unknown. That was where all my anxiety/OCD/depression used to stem from. I thought of every breath I took as another breath closer to the end. And yes, that’s just as miserable as it sounds. Somehow I grew out of that and learned to accept that I have no idea what’s going to happen. The only explanation I have for that growth is the years I spent afraid. I woke up one day and was truly just sick of it. Occasionally, something will come up and send me back to the form of my younger self; but I’m quick to come back and shut that down.

Not knowing what the future holds is scary. However, there is absolutely nothing we can do about it. Train your mind to find this exciting. Use it to push yourself into taking chances. Stop over-analyzing everything, start accepting that you could be in the line-of-fire at any given second. And that is the ONLY reason you need to live your best life every second you’re given the privilege to take another breath.

-Kelsi

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